How to Win a Princess's Heart
by KatPocketMonster
Summary: There are three steps on how to win a Princess's heart and the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony, Discord, is there to prove it! Follow Discord as he "tries" to win The Co-ruler of Equestria, Princess Celestia's, heart! Lets just hope Celestia is in a "loving" mood...Find this story on FIMFiction!
1. Step One: Flowers for a Pretty Pony

"Ahh, once again her sunset is simply remarkable and as always unique."

Resting on one of the many balconies outside of the castle, Discord lay there, resting his head on his paws/claws as he stares with a goofy expression at the setting sun. Sighing once the sun has disappeared behind the distant mountains, Discord chanced a glance at the balcony a few towers beside him. With her head raised and her magic flared, Princess Celestia finishes her duty for another day. Still watching, Discord admires her from a distance, as he has for more than a thousand years. At the very thought he frowned, thinking how pathetic that is. He would probably be the oldest living Draconequus or any living creature at that! To hold a secret affection for another, without it being noticed in any way.

Sitting back up, he quickly slithers his way into the room and starts searching for books on romance and confessions, anything to help him win the mares heart that lies in the not so distant tower. Humming to himself as he quickly skims through his 12th book, he finds something that catches his eye. "How To Win a Mares Heart in Three Easy Steps" was what he read, grinning happily the hugs the small book to his chest and snaps his talons, vanishing in a cloud of smoke.

"Hehehe ohboyohboyohboy, this is going to work marvelously! Even the book says that its 'easy'! Now my embarrassingly long admiration can finally come to an end! Mwahaha-ahem.

Sitting on his 'throne' in his room, Discord quickly opens the book to the first chapter which read "Step One: Give the Mare of your Dreams a bouquet of her favorite Flowers!" His smile dimmed, he's already done that! Now frowning, Discord reads through the chapter seeing nothing that could help him. Slamming the book shut, he decided to 'wing it' and try his own way at giving her flowers, yet again.

"Lets just hope she notices this time..." Discord muttered to himself as he vanishes once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~(◡﹏◕✿)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sitting at her large desk, Princess Celestia quietly reads her latest weekly 'friendship report' from her former student, Princess Twilight Sparkle. Huffing in amusement at what she read, she failed to notice the knocking at her rooms door. Fully engrossed in her reading, Celestia finally finishes the extra long 'friendship report'. Putting the scroll away in one of her files, she stands and stretches her aching legs and wings for sitting for so long and makes her way to the door. Upon opening the said door, she blinked in surprise and confusion at seeing an oddly, shy, Discord with his arms behind his back and using his only hoof pawed at the imaginary dirt on the carpet.

"Why hello Discord, this is certainly a surprise to see you this late, is there anything I can help you with?"

"Ahem, yes, hello to you also Princess..." clearing his throat, he looks up at Celestia and looks into her pale magenta eyes.  
>"..."<p>

"..."

"..."

"Um, is there anything I can help you with?" Celestia asks hesitantly as Discord looks at her in a goofy way, turning her head over her shoulder to check if its something behind her, but sees nothing. "Is something the matter?" she asks again when she turns back to him.

"Oh! Oh um yes! Yes! Um...Here!" Throwing his once hidden arms at Celestia, forgetting how close she was standing and accidentally shoves the brightly colored flowers right into her face and muzzle. "Oh dear, I am so sorry Princess!" quickly he brings his arms to his chest and nervously watches Princess Celestia for any negative reactions.

"Ah...Ahhh...ACHOOO! Oh my..." Quickly turning her sniffly face away and grabs a nearby tissue to clean her muzzle of the pollen and mucus before turning back to Discord, blushing in embarrassment at a non-regal action.

"I am dreadfully sorry Princess! I honestly didn't mean for that to happen, I didn't know you were um, standing that close. Oh and bless you" Gulping nervously he shakily hands her the boutique of her favorite assorted flowers to her. "Um these are for you, your majesty".

"Why thank you Discord _sniff_ ahem pardon me, these are lovely, I didn't know that you knew what my favorite assorted flowers were?" With a small smile upon her muzzle, she uses her magic to take the flowers out of his paws/claws and takes a careful whiff of the pleasant aroma the flowers were giving off. "They smell delightful, but what are these for may I ask?" She looks at Discord with her head tilted in question.

"Oh um just a lucky guess?" Truthfully Discord actually read the book on "Equestria's Alicorn's" and looked at the chapter that tells the biography on Princess Celestia, what she doesn't know wont hurt her. "I just wanted to...give a pretty pony some flowers." He grinned bashfully up at her but quickly dimmed when he noticed she had her eye brow raised in a questioning manner.

"'Pretty pony'?"

"Um did I say 'pretty pony'!? I meant beautiful mare! Yeah uh that's it! Hehe...heh." Wringing his paws/claws together nervously and tries not to make eye contact with the questioning Princess in front of him.

"Um why thank you Discord, that's very nice of you." Looking behind her again out the large window to see that her sister has already raised her moon. "I'm sorry Discord I must go and have my supper with my sister before it gets to late and she starts to wonder where I am and thank you again for the lovely flowers." Smiling again she moves the bouquet of flowers into an empty vase on her desk, nodding to Discord, she makes her way down the hall to where her sister is waiting patiently to enjoy their evening meal.

"Yes, you're welcome Princess, I will see you again and enjoy your meal." Once Celestia turned the corner, he lowering his head in disappointment at yet another fail with flowers, he snaps his talons and vanishes to his room to read the next chapter in "How to Win a Mares Heart in Three Easy Steps".

"Step One was a complete and utter failure! I just hope step two is much more successful, or I'll he having a friendly little chat to the author"


	2. Step Two: Romantic Poems to Sway a Heart

Letting her magic fade, Celestia stands and watches the sun rise and the sky changes a from violet to pale blue. Turning on the spot she makes her way back into her room to begin her work in signing contracts and planning future meetings.

After a few hours of working, Celestia's mind began to wonder to last nights odd encounter with Discord. Still confused on what exactly happened, she turned her head to the bouquet still resting in the vase on the edge of the table. Sighing tiredly she gently takes one of the many flowers and takes one of the petals between her teeth, savoring the delicious taste of the petal. Humming she closes her eyes and begins to eat the other petals of the flower, but now that her eyes are closed she replays the events of last nights encounter.

After many petals and many unanswered questions later, Celestia opens her eyes again to find all that's left of the beautiful bouquet bare of any flowers, only the stalks remain. Sighing in slight disappointment Celestia stands and stretches her tired joints before making her way to the door. Upon opening the door she again is face to face with a not-so-shy Discord holding what's looks to be a very long scroll, enough to even rival Twilight Sparkles weekly report scrolls.

"Ahem, why good morning Princess Celestia! Why, you're looking lovely today." Smiling Discord levitates above the carpet in front of her and starts to unravel the scroll.

"Thank you Discord and good morning to you also." Her smiling face slightly dimmed at seeing the scroll roll across the ground between her hooves. "May I ask what you, um, have there?"

"Oh this little thing? Just a poem I have written just for you!" Now grinning, Discord raises the scroll up to his face to begin reading.

"A poem you say?" Gulping nervously Princess Celestia again looks down at the long scroll and up at the now reading Discord. "Oh dear..."

~~~~~~~~~~~ 〜(^∇^〜）Hours earlier（〜^∇^)〜 ~~~~~~~~~~~

That night Discord again opened the book "How to Win a Mares Heart in Three Easy Steps" and turns to the next chapter. Finding that it says "Step Two: Tell your Mare Beautiful Poems to Sway her Heart", humming in thought Discord begins to think up some poems that would surely reveal his hearts desire. Suddenly snapping his talons, an empty scroll and quill appears in front of him.

"I know just the poems that'll make Celestia completely Ga-Ga over me! Well, close to it anyway." Chuckling at the mental image, Discord sits down at his desk at begins writing the best poems he can think of to finally win Princess Celestia's heart!

~~~~~~~~~~~ 〜(^∇^〜）Present time（〜^∇^)〜 ~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ahem, let me begin with my first and personal favorite, poem 'Secret Admirer'" Smiling up at the confused Princess, he failed to notice that her eyes were not focused on him but over his shoulder. Looking back down at the scroll Discord begins to read.

"I've never been the type to say what I feel

So basically I keep everything inside

And with you it was no different

I want to tell you, believe me I've tried

But there's part of me that just can't take that chance

So I doubt that you'll ever know

Which may be fine with you, but it's hurting me

I choose not to show it though

I guess I'm your secret admirer

That name seems to fit just right

I don't know what I like about you

But you're on my mind, day and night

Maybe it's the way you look

So sexy I can't get enough

Or how you make me feel when you come around

I instantly forget all other stuff

Maybe it's the way you say my name

Or maybe it's the way you smile

Then again it might just be everything

Getting to know you seems worth my while

But I guess I'll never know what it is

My true feelings I could never reveal to you

I'll just admire you from a distance

I'm not sure what else there is to do"

"So what did you...huh!?" His grin quickly dimmed at seeing Celestia with neutral expression looking over his shoulder. Looking behind him he sees Princess Luna and two guards watching him curiously. "Um Princess Celestia?" he asks quietly and slightly saddened as he turns back to the silent Princess.

"Oh I'm sorry Discord, I was just um thinking about something." Truthfully Celestia noticed her sister and guards standing there watching and she became oddly nervous at the attention they were giving them. At this, Celestia didn't hear a single word Discord has said. "Would you like to repeat that?"

"Oh...no it's OK Princess, it was nothing really heh." Discord said quietly with a forced smile to cover up his disappointment. "I think I should go and leave you to your duties" and just like that Discord vanished into a puff of smoke without another word.

"My dear sister, I think you may have hurt Discords feelings with not listening to what he was saying."

Looking back to her sister, Celestia noticed she had a disappointed expression before she shook her head and continued her way down the hall. Now alone, Princess Celestia sighs sadly at the rudeness she just showed and turns back to her room, forgetting what she originally wanted to do before running into Discord.

"I'm sorry, I swear the next time you show up at my door I'll fix my horrible mistake."


	3. Step Three: Show a Mare you Got Moves

Looking through scrolls that have been sent to her from various ponies, Princess Celestia skims through them only to notice a stamped scroll. Raising her eyebrow delicately in interest, Celestia picks it up with her magic and opens it up and begins to read what was written.

_Dear Princess Celestia and Princess Luna. _

_With great honor, we would like to request that you and your younger sister, Luna, to attend the 1001th anniversary and your ruling of Canterlot tomorrow evening at the Grand Hall. We hope that you will find the time for you and Princess Luna to be present on the party. Please let us know whether you can or cannot join us for whatever reason. _

_Best regards, _

_The Mayor of Canterlot, Florescence Beam. _

Reading through the scroll a few more times, Celestia gets an idea. Quickly rolling up the scroll, she brings out an empty scroll and a quill, setting them down on her desk, she starts to write her reply.

_Dear Mayor Florescence Beam. _

_My sister and I would happily attend this special occasion, also, if I may, I would like to invite a special friend of mine. We will be looking forward to tomorrow evening. _

_With Regards, _

_Princess Celestia._

Rolling up the scroll with a smile, she puts the royal Equestrian stamp on it and sends the scroll to the mayor. Standing up, she makes her way out of her room to inform Luna and her 'special friend' on the celebration that will be happening tomorrow evening.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Knock, knock, knock_

Laying in a large bed, Discord rolls over under his blanket mumbling in his slumber.

_Knock, knock, knock_

Scrunching up his closed eyes in annoyance at the constant knocking, he sits up and faces the direction of the noise. Opening his eyes sleepily at hearing the knocking for a third time he finally responds.

"Yes yes, who is it!?" Was his, clearly irritated, reply.

"Discord it's me, I'd like to talk with you for a moment."

Suddenly becoming more awake, Discord bolts to the door. Making sure he looked like his handsome self, he slowly opens the door to see the smiling face of Princess Celestia.

"Um, good morning Princess, is there something I can help you with?" Swallowing the extra saliva that was building up in his mouth, he nervously looks into Celestia's eyes to wait for her response.

"Yes well, first of all I wanted to apologize for my poor excuse of my behavior late yesterday evening," Celestia quietly said before continuing in a more clearer tone, "as an apology, I would like you to accompany me and my sister to the 1001th anniversary party of my ruling her in Canterlot tomorrow evening." She finished as she smiled up at the now surprised face of Discord.

"It's all OK Princess, I should have noticed that you had other things in mind," Discord sheepishly replied "and has it really been that long already? Why, I would be honored to attend with your Highness's in this wonderful celebration!" Grinning charmingly to Princess Celestia as he straightened up in front of her.

"Wonderful! I shall meet you at the entrance so we can take the carriage down to the Hall." Celestia smiled widened when Discord accepted, feeling much less guilty than before her arrival at his door.

"Why of course Princess! I shall see you tomorrow evening."

Now feeling oddly blissful, Celestia says her goodbyes and makes her way back to her room to finish her days work. Finally more at peace after her encounter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After closing his door, Discord walks past his desk, only for that dreaded book to catch his eye. Remembering that there was only one chapter left, he hesitantly picks up the book and turns to the third, and last, chapter.

"'You have finally made it to the last step!'" Discord read to himself "'Step Three: Ask your mare for a romantic dance under the moonlight'" Snapping the book shut, Discord looks out of his window to watch the raising sun.

"This must be destiny! Tomorrow at the celebration party, I shall ask Princess Celestia to dance with me! She has to notice my affections with that!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The very next day that evening, Discord stands waiting beside the carriage for the two Princess's to arrive. Hearing the large Oak doors opening, Discord turns to see the Princess's smiling at him as they make their way up to him.

"Good evening Discord I should hope that you'll be on your best behavior?" Luna says, grinning slyly to Discord as he grins back.

"Sister, please don't give him any ideas."

After all three of them shared a good laugh, Discord opens the carriage door for the Princess's to enter first.

"After you, your highness's!"

"Hmm so far so good."

"Luna..." Celestia jokingly warns as Discord hold in his chuckles.

"Ahem, my apologizes, let us make hast immediately before we become unfashionably late!" Luna replied in her usually 'Royal Canterlot voice' as they sat down inside the carriage as Discord sits across from them.

"Guards! We are ready to depart when you are ready."

"On our way your highness's!" the four Pegasus Guards towing the carriage replied to Celestia as they started to make their way to the Hall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Good evening Princess Luna and Princess Celestia, Oh! And of course Discord, for attending this wonderful celebration!" A Bright yellow stallion with a neatly combed white mane, Mayor Florescence Beam, greeted as the three immortals exited the carriage.

"Good evening to you also Mayor, we wouldn't miss it for the world" Celestia replied as they all trotted inside to be greeted by hundreds of ponies of all kinds either dancing, eating or chatting to each other in the large hall.

Saying their goodbyes to the Mayor, Luna makes an excuse and quickly departs to the other end of the Hall to greet one of her friends, leaving a confused Celestia and a fidgeting Discord alone at the entrance.

"Say uh Princess, would you...like to dance?" Discord mumbles quietly, but enough for Celestia to hear.

"Would later be OK? I um, need to talk to my sister for a moment." Flashing a quick smile, she briskly walks to where she last seen Luna.

"Oh...OK then Celestia, I'll just be waiting here..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ahem pardon me, but could I please speak to my sister for a moment?" Celestia asked the green and yellow Unicorn stallion that was talking to her sister in the far corner of the Hall. Nodding quickly he says his fare wells and walks away leaving Celestia and Luna alone.

"Is something the matter sister?" Luna Questioned as she noticed her sister looked odd.

"Luna I think...I-I think Discord um may 'like' me." Celestia quickly says.

"Really?...I haven't noticed."

"Pardon?" Celestia questioned, not having heard the last part.

"Um never mind!" Luna quickly says "And what would be the problem with that?" She continues.

"...Um..."

"_Sigh_ look, dear sister of mine, why not ask him to talk outside and get everything cleared up?"

"Alright Luna, I think that's a good idea..." Hugging her sister in thanks, she turns to go back to where Discord was.

"Wait!" Luna yells quickly to get Celestia's attention "What ever happens, please keep in mind of his feelings, we don't want what happened yesterday to happen again."

"Of course Luna, I am not making the same mistake again." Turning back, Celestia trots back over to where she last seen Discord.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(▰˘◡˘▰)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Discord?"

Freezing up Discord spins around to face the nervous looking Princess. Face stuffed with assorted pastries, he mumbles back a reply.

"Mres Mrinserss?" Forcefully swallowing the pastries he repeats his question "Yes Princess?"

"Could I speak with you outside for a moment please?"

"Uh of course?"

Making their way outside they walk their way to a small hill not far away. Turning to face Discord, Celestia finally brings up the courage to ask the question that was floating in her head.

"Discord, these last couple of days," letting the question hang for a few seconds she carefully continues "were you trying to court me?"

_Oh no oh no oh no!_ Panicked, Discord looks around to try and find an excuse, finding none. He slumps his shoulders in defeat.

"Yes princess, but I have always liked you since the very beginning. Only these last few days was it that I actually tried to show them." _And failed all three times terribly_ he silently thought.

Eyes widening in surprise, steps back a little, watching Discord look to the ground sadly.

"I-I never knew, for all these years? Why haven't you said anything sooner?"

"B-because I was...scared and it was clear you didn't like me all those years ago." Discord responded as he looked up at the Princess. "I-I'm sorry...I shouldn't have said anything at all!" Closing his eyes he raises his talon to disappear, only to be forced not to by Celestia.

"No, please don't go Discord," Celestia hesitated with the next part "I um may not have noticed your intentions all of this time, but I'm willing to...'give it a shot' as ponies these days say." Blushing embarrassingly she releases Discords talon.

"W-what!? You would? Really!?" He couldn't believe what he just heard those words leaving Celestia's mouth. Seeing her nod, he couldn't hold back his happiness! Wrapping his paws/claws around the surprised Princess's neck he pulls her in and kisses her squarely on her muzzle.

Pulling away out of embarrassment and surprise, they hear laughing behind them. Both turning they see Luna grinning suggestively at them both.

"Should I call for a room for you both? Or should I arrange a priest?"

"Luna!" Both Celestia and Discord yelled in union.

"Hehe, I'm sorry! But I just wanted to say congratulations! I am very happy for you both" Smiling at the new couple, Luna spreads her wings and fly's back to the Grand Hall, leaving the heavily blushing pair behind.

All three steps may have not worked for Discord in the best of ways, some not at all! But they have helped him become closer to Princess Celestia in the end. Let's just hope Discord can up his good behavior with having Celestia by his side.

_~Fin~_


End file.
